A Swift Response To: The Purge

A half hour into watching The Purge my cat threw up in its litter box. It was disgusting, it was carnage, it was the pearl harbor of cat sick. I got down on my knees, slapped on some marigolds and scraped churned meat and mouse residue out of the sodden saw dust with my hands. I chose to do this, I chose to stick my fingers in the puke of the century because it was more enjoyable than the next 70 minutes of film. At least the sick was unique, and mildly scary.

I was excited about The Purge. The premise is, to an extent, quite original. Yet James DeMonaco fails to make the most of it, relapsing into cliche horror props that have little or no relevance to the plot. Queue face masks and creepy children’s laughter at regular intervals. What is relevant to the plot is even more hackneyed. Guess who’s supposed to have ‘the best security in the neighborhood?’ Our protagonist. Guess who compromises this security? Their creepy little kid. Its predictable, its unentertaining. 

But i could have suffered through this if it weren’t for the plot holes. Ever seen the movie Holes? Yeah, so there’s less holes in the movie Holes than their are holes in the Purge. Let me set the scene. You are Ethan Hawke. Your son lets a random, bloodstained stranger into the home. Following this, your daughter’s boyfriend tries to shoot you (for apparently very little reason). Your daughter runs off somewhere in your massive house. With the knowledge some guy is in your house too, you don’t care to look for her for at least four hours on the one night murder is legal. This film fails to achieve any standard of plot or basic parenting.

I’m actually almost as tired writing this article as I was watching the movie. So here’s the rest of the review. Graphics, average; acting, mediocre; script, terrible; Directing, was there any?

Halloween’s coming up soon and I’m sure a large proportion of you will want to watch a horror movie. Want it to be thrilling, terrifying or original? Watch a good film, watch Silence of the Lambs. Don’t watch The Purge.